LOVE & LUST

Love is something that cannot be brought. It is priceless, it is gifted by God. If you have strong faith, we will never be lack of love. If you have strong faith, God will grant you with all kind of love. You will be loved by the God, you will be raised up in a family with full of love. But, once you take these as granted, all will be taken away without hesitation. For the ones who do not cherish their gifted love, for those who betray himself or herself and for those who against the laws of nature, God has prepared the way or the journey of their lives for them to earn tiny bit of love by going through retribution and trial. Everyone is treated fairly. God has a plan for everyone, it differs for different people.

In another hand, for those who have been being so well, for those who have so firm and deep faith and for those who have followed the guidance, they deserve something more and beyond, love and lust. Love and lust are for the ones who are ready to build up a family. God allows an intimate relationship between a pair of different gender couple to build up the foundation of family in the vast of love and lust.

In this modern century, love and lust have become so common between boys and girls. As a result, the situation becomes very terrible and complicated when young teenagers cannot distinguish love and lust. Pure lust is based solely on physical attraction and fantasy. It often dissipates when the "real person" surfaces. It is the stage of wearing rose coloured glasses when he or she "can do no wrong". Being in love doesn't exclude lust. In fact, lust can lead to love. However Love, on the other hand, isn't an immediate feeling. It grows over time. Real love, not based on idealization or projection, requires time to get to know each other. Love is more akin to a friendship than to a coupling. To paraphrase the psychiatrist M Scott Peck, love is the desire to extend yourself at whatever personal cost for the purpose of nurturing the growth and furthering the dreams of another individual. Love is effortful, it involves personal sacrifice, and it grows slowly. Love is not about "me" or what I can have. It's about "you" and what can I do to make your life richer.

But people may imagine that lustful feelings can by themselves hold a relationship together for ever. And this brings us to the second reason why so many people are easily addicted to lust in today's society. They find it difficult to differentiate between what we have and what we imagine we could have. That's not surprising. We're constantly bombarded with images of perfect bodies, and stories of idyllic relationships which, as soon as they're no longer idyllic, can easily be traded in for another idyllic relationship. These images and stories, together with the advertising mantra that "you deserve better", has led many to believe that “better” is outside of us, somewhere, if only we can find it. Here are some signs to watch for to differentiate pure lust from love.

SIGNS OF LUST

• You're totally focused on a person's looks and body.
• You're interested in having sex, but not in having conversations.
• You'd rather keep the relationship on a fantasy level, not discuss real feelings.
• You want to leave soon after sex rather than cuddling or breakfast the next morning.
• You are lovers, but not friends.

SIGNS OF LOVE

• You want to spend quality time together other than sex.
• You get lost in conversations and forget about the hours passing.
• You want to honestly listen to each other's feelings, make each other happy.
• He or she motivates you to be a better person.
• You want to get to meet his or her family and friends.

If one has approached the stage of love and lust without consent of God, faith no longer stays strong and it starts to fade away. When that point of time, the lust has controlled his or her mind and faith no longer exists in his or her heart. As retribution, he or she will bear the consequences and responsibilities. As told by the God, we can dance to celebrate, we can love to live. So, love while you are young. Have a great life and cherish the one who loves you and love truly the one whom you love.  Have a deep believe in God and temptations and evils will never corrode you.

Mak Chee Mun
            18499
            Chemical Engineering